For me, though, it was one thing to acknowledge the many-paths-up-the-mountain argument in the abstract. It was something entirely different to realize it through direct experience. When I was a Goddess worshipper, I paid lip service to ecumenism, but I didn't really believe it. I disdained the patriarchal religions, especially the one that dominates my own culture. I truly believed that any woman who practiced Christianity, Judaism or Islam was little more than an obliging doormat. And, even though I didn't express it openly, I felt that anyone who chose to follow these faiths was misguided, incorrect, and maybe just a little cowardly not to break free of them. I was even a little smug about it.
I don't think Goddess cares for self-righteousness, and She had a way of dealing with my attitude. My love of nature, that had brought me to Goddess in the first place, led me to the writings of Matthew Fox. Now, how a feminist Goddess follower ever looked at his writings in the first place, those of a Christian, and, on top of that, a guy, still amazes me. It happened, as miracles seem to, inexplicably. I read Fox's book called Original Blessing, and was captivated from the first paragraph. Fox spoke of the Word of God.
The Word was not just blind acceptance of some ancient mythology, but a living force of Creation. And Creation itself was not some static event in the inconceivable past, but a dynamic, moving, ever-new process. The Word was alive. It was awe, joy, mystery, and ecstasy. I could feel it. I saw the Word in everything, from tree branches against the gray morning sky to my hands grasping a pencil. My life of spirit became deeper and richer. Before I had the chance to catch my breath, I was talking to an Episcopal priest about being baptized. Goddess, clearly, has a sense of humor. Little Ms. Smarty Pants who had all the answers woke up one day and found herself turned into a Christian.
Goddess used to be absolutely real for me. Now the Word fills my vision. I don't see this as one supplanting the other. It's more of a transformation, where Goddess worshipper became Creation-centered Christian like Snake Woman shedding Her skin. In no way do I feel I've turned away from Goddess. Goddess is just no longer how I conceive of the Mystery. It's just a matter of what I see when I look toward the inexpressible. This spiritual shape-shifting has made the unity of all light-seeking faiths real for me. We really are all one. As if we all hear the Cosmic sound and sing back a different note in the harmony.
So, here I am, in my new skin, still in SisterSpirit, still participating in circle, still loving Goddess, really, but now as a Christian, with a different perspective, with added dimension, and reveling in every aspect of the irony. If you don't believe She changes everything She touches, you'd better look behind you. May the peace of the Christ be ever in our hearts. Om. Amen.
Blessed be. by Silverskye
Further reading (free e-books):
Snorri Sturlson - The Prose Edda Ver 1Sandra Ingerman - Shamanic Journeying A Beginner Guide
Ida Craddock - The Wedding Night
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